ADHD and its relationship with trauma
Trauma has been showing its face
I walked home later than usual for work a couple of weeks ago. I haven’t been driving as my car is out of service; not my fault, and that is a story for a different day. I was about to cross the road, I looked both ways and saw a car coming up the road to the left of me, but it did not have an indicator on so I assumed that they weren’t turning into my road. So I stepped into the road. Something told me to look left, and as I did, I was clipped by a car. I fell to the floor but was able to get back up relatively quickly. I assessed myself and was in no pain, but I had a few cuts on my right hand, and the whole left side of my jacket was torn up. I don’t know how that happened, but I went back to where I fell and picked up my airport, which was mashed up. Why I did that, I don’t know.
As I began to walk off, the guy that hit me pulled over, which was kind of him and asked if I was ok. He asked twice, and because I am who I am, I simply said, “I am fine, thank you.” I did not even think to stop and take the gentleman’s insurance details. I just wanted to go home. So I did. I walked 10 mins home, and I called my cousin. My cousin is a doctor, and I felt she was the best person to talk to. I showed her my hand, and she instructed me to clean my cuts. I did not have anything to clean the cut but some rum. I poured rum over my hand and continued to talk with my cousin. Thankfully, she mentioned that she would be working tomorrow so I could go into to hospital just to get a complete physical I wasn’t in pain, but the adrenaline may have worn off by then.
I then called my boyfriend. I planned to cook for him for our date night, but I just had to chill. I didn’t even have ibrufophen (medication for pain relief), so my boyfriend brought some for me, and we just chilled before he ushered me to bed as I wanted to go to the hospital before I went to work (I know, I was still thinking about going to work). When I woke up the following morning, I did not feel any pain; thankfully, I went to my office to pick up my laptop and went to the hospital. My cousin managed to see me quickly, I had an X-ray and an ultrasound of my organs, and all is well. I called my manager to update her, and she told me to go home and rest, but I insisted on continuing to work from home, going against doctors’ orders to let me rest. I finished my work an hour early, which was excellent, and I left for a few days, after which was lucky.
My response to trauma
As you may have noticed, I have yet to mention trauma. I don’t know if I have processed this trauma as yet. I am very blasé about many things lately, and this may be how I cope with things and how I process trauma. I feel fine, as if nothing has happened. But perhaps, I may have a delayed reaction to trauma. So, I decided to look into ADHD and trauma and see if there is a correlation.
Studies have shown that those who experience trauma are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD. Examples include being bullied, struggling socially and academically, and other life events that may have happened during childhood.
Trauma symptoms may include: difficulty concentrating, poor memory, anxiety, disrupted sleep and more. These symptoms also overlap with symptoms of ADHD, which I found interesting.
Recently, I have been feeling more anxious and experiencing bouts of low mood. This may be due to SAD. The change in weather and the shorter days have contributed to this. Also, masking is a technique that I have mastered over the year. This may also be a trauma response: acting as if everything is ok.
Other examples of trauma responses include: being unable to relax and feeling on guard all the time, having issues at school or work, being unable to concentrate, feeling very tired, getting irritated more efficiently and more.
This is how trauma manifests in my life. To overcome these symptoms, I am trying my best to stay on top of everything: work, social life, meditating, praying and doing other self-care bits.
I am continuing to go to therapy and believe that over time, I will be able to process trauma differently, but for now, this is how my beautiful brain processes trauma.
Take away
I hope you find this post informative and eye-opening.
I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason, and the experiences I have had thus far are helpful in my journey of self-love and growth.
If you believe you are experiencing trauma and/or are struggling to process it, it may be worth speaking with your loved ones and a trained professional if you care to.
Thank you for reading and take care.
