This year was my first valentine’s single as a pringle
Honestly, part of me is like okay! Less stress, I can save myself some money and I be the hermit that I want to be and stay up in my bed all day. It is one of my favourite places in the world.
And then, I get really melancholic and pensive. I think to myself, damn for 3 years, I was spreading love and receiving the love on valetine’s and now I am feeling lonely. All the loving is gone now and I am alone with my thoughts and my feelings.
Girl, you are not alone. It is ok to be single on valentine’s. It is not the end of the world and perhaps soon you will meet your person so enjoy this time that you have all to yourself. It is precious and you need this time to love on yourself and give yourself all the love you deserve because you deserve it all darling. All and then some!
Now, I am going to talk about how I showed myself some love during this love holiday.
Self-care was essential
Over the valentine’s weekend, I want all in self-care. I gave myself a much-needed mani-pedi. I did a face mask because my skin will be glowy and dewy all summer do you hear me?! I took care of my hair, gave myself a scalp massage, took care of my body; stretched, did some yoga and exercise. I had a body scrub in the shower, scrubbed and took my sweet time in the shower and I didn’t feel bad. My skin feels and looks beautiful. All the effort I put into my self-care is showing up.
I looked after my external as well as internal.
“I put my wellbeing on a pedestal”. I read my book 12 rules of life. It has some gems and it is nice to read to take my mind off from what is going on around. I meditated; which I hope to do more of. Meditation is a daily essential in my life and has helped me to calm down a lot. Mindfulness practices overall are key to heightening your self-awareness. I journal every day. Over the weekend, I specifically focused on my feelings, the love I have for myself and the love that I will attract into my life when the time is right.
I spoiled myself as I deserve to
One thing about me, I like to save my money. All the money that I can! Most of the money that I do spend is on food! I rarely spend money on other stuff such as clothes. I just feel guilty and I feel like I don’t need all these things, therefore, I don’t buy them.
However, I had a change of heart. I deserve to spend a little extra on myself. I work hard, I deserve to treat myself and if it makes me feel better. Why the hell not? It is not that I am going crazy and overspending. I still am within my limits. I can do this occasionally and if it adds to my happiness just a little bit then that’s fine by me.
I spoke with my friends
My friends have really helped me over the last several months. They have encouraged me to keep going and have helped me to take my mind off things. I have friends that are also going through things so we all support one another any way that we can. One thing that I love about my support system, is that they really know me. They know when I am down even when I say that I am fine. But over time, I have become more vulnerable with them which has helped with my growth overall.
Counselling and some more counselling
I am an advocate for counselling. I believe it’s a healthy way to rant, get things off your chest and have an outside perspective on ways that you can manage your mood. I behaviour and change how you manoeuvre in this world.
I pay for private long-term counselling which I believe is useful for me as I used to be so quiet and reserved so perhaps, I need to untangle some trauma deep down. I like hearing about other people’s perspectives about my situations. I welcome it!
In addition, I recently started psychosexual counselling which is something that I am quite excited about if I am honest. Sexuality is a topic that was never discussed growing up; in the home and outside of the home. I do wonder about what I am going to learn and how I will apply it to my life. Delving into my being in every way: sexually, spiritually, mentally and physically. There are so many facets to us and we should explore all areas to better ourselves each and every day.
Take away
I love the space that I am in. Growing, learning and loving who I am becoming. This time alone was necessary and preparing me for what’s to come. I hope you all had a great valentine no matter how you spend it. You deserve all the love so don’t wait for others to give you the love. Give it to yourself first, always.
