What Is Depression?
Depression is classified as a mental health disorder whereby an individual experiences a constant low mood that may impact daily routines. At some point, we all may experience a time when we are not feeling our best mentally, but when it comes to depression, the low moods may last a considerable amount of time.
How many people are diagnosed with depression in the UK alone = MIND, a mental health charity in England, stated that 3 in 100 people are diagnosed with depression in any given week in England alone. At the same time, 8 in 100 people are diagnosed with anxiety and depression combined.
Dual diagnosis is common, specifically with anxiety and depression, as some of the symptoms overlap.
Different Types Of Depression
Depression can be broken down into different categories=
Depressive episode- This is given when the doctors actually make a diagnosis. It may be classified as mild, moderate or severe.
Dysthymia- Mild depression that lasts for more than a period of 2 years. It may be called persistent depression.
Seasonal affective disorder- People diagnosed with SAD tend to have a low mood during the colder months. It may also be called major depressive disorder with a seasonal pattern.
If you would like to know more about depression, click here.
Symptoms Of Depression
Some individuals may experience many of the symptoms listed below, whereas others may not; the symptoms can be very complex and differ between people.
Physical can include:
-Changes in weight and appetite
-Disturbed sleep (maybe insomnia)
-lack of energy
Psychological symptoms:
- Low self esteem
- Low continuous mood
- Little to no motivation
***High functioning depression (HFD) is not a clinical disorder according to the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (DSM 5); therefore, it is interpreted differently from person to person.
What Is High Functioning Depression?
On the outside, you may appear as you everything together. Work; you are on you’re A-game, nothing seems to be wrong in your relationship, and you have a steady balance of work-life and social life. But on the inside, it is a completely different story.
My Interpretation Of HFD
As of lately, I have been struggling, if I am brutally honest.
If you have read my previous posts, you know that my work situation has been very stopping and go. But now, I am finally in a permanent position with the potential to grow and learn things that will help me in my career.
Yay.
I enjoy my job, but working in the social service/mental health field can be physically draining and mentally too.
12-hour shifts, working days and nights and working with those with mental health and/or challenging behaviour is hard work.
I don’t want to sound like I am complaining because I have manifested this job, and I am extremely grateful. From last year to this, I am blessed to be working again.
Having an intense work schedule demands me to be structured.
To factor in some needed me time, I ensure that;
I wake up extra early to go to the gym. Working out and lifting heavy is very therapeutic for me. I love it and won’t trade it for the world. I need that time for me. By the time I have finished my workout and gone home, it’s all before 6 am.
Due to the intensity of the workout, I try to find a nap. I know it’s not ideal and will impact the quality of sleep later on, but I am already drained, and I haven’t even started work yet.
Fast forward to the workplace; rarely do I fall asleep at some point during the day. I know what you’re thinking…again?!
Yes.
I have come to realize that when I feel that I am getting depressed and low, all I want to do is sleep.
As I work pretty much 48 hours a week when I do get days off. All I want to do is rest, and I rarely schedule a time to meet up with my friends because I am exhausted.
When I have time on my hand, I like to reflect on how I once was. The life of the party. The turn-up Queen.
Now, my main focus is my to-do lists and making sure I stay on top of everything I have to do. That consists of:
-Gym
-Blog posts
-Film, edit and upload YT videos either during work or find time somehow to get it done on my days off IF I have the energy to do so.
I don’t find joy in the things that I used to do. One thing that does keep me going in the gym. I love seeing my hard work pay off, but besides that, I struggle to have something to look forward to.
Currently, I am in the mindset that all I have to do is work and save as much money as possible.
Perhaps this is the aftermath of the pandemic.
Perhaps this is how I feel as I get older.
Each year as my birthday comes and goes, I notice a trend in my mood, and it hit me for the last year.
I am getting older, and at times, I feel like my life is rushing by, and I am simply hovering over.
Like I have a front-row seat to my life, and I am watching it on the big screen.
I want to be present.
And I am working on it.
I meditate every day, but recently, I have noticed that my mind is constantly racing, thinking about work, life, relationships, everything but the present moment.
I have to force myself to do the basic stuff.
I consider myself a clean person, but getting in the shower sometimes takes a lot more effort than normal (don’t worry, I am showering every day). It shouldn’t require so much effort, but it does.
I can cry at a drop of a dime.
This may be due to a lack of sleep, perhaps, but I am sensitive sally. The other night, I literally started crying before bed, which is when I tend to cry if I need to because no one will know.
No matter what is happening, my main purpose is to remain happy and at peace.
How To Cope
Therapy is a godsend. I have had therapy in the past, and I believe I should be in it right now, but it is all about fitting it into my schedule.
Journaling– I have continued to journal throughout the ups and downs, but I could be more detailed. At times, I do it to do it. The intention behind it is what matters.
Work routine– Initially, I was put on to do nights which I struggled with as I can’t sleep during the day, and my sleep overall is rubbish, but it would be great to plan my weeks. Last week I didn’t find out how I was working the following week until Friday. Yes, Friday, 2 days before Monday.
Get sleep– Sleep is super important and can impact your mood greatly. Having a sleep routine and trying to sleep simultaneously every day does help, but it isn’t proving easy with my routine.
Take Away
Many of us will go through episodes of depression at some point in time.
It is hard, but we will make it through.
Take each day as it comes, incorporate self-care and speak kindly to yourself and speak to a professional if possible.
Take care of yourself.
Thanks for reading, and stay safe.
XO
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